KICKASS WITCH : Putting The "K" In Magick
Do you ever feel like there's a gigantic gap between the way you're living now and the life of your dreams? Do you sometimes wish you could wave a magick wand and all of your problems would just disappear so that you could finally step into the kickass life you know you were meant to lead? I can't promise you that transformation is as easy as waving a magick wand, but I do have quite a few tricks up my sleeve and am more than happy to share them with you here. So, chin up, Gorgeous, stick around and, most importantly... BELIEVE!

Thursday, April 4, 2013

AUTiSM AWARENESS : 8 KickAss Tips For Living With & Loving Someone With Autism -xo

I am the mother of an AWESOME 19 year old boy with autism- okay, he's technically a man now, but I'm still a tad in denial about that! 

We have been on quite the journey together, and I have learned so many things by being his mom. He has taught me patience, kindness, and how to appreciate the little things in life.

I would be so honored to one day be able to impart some of that wisdom onto others and perhaps spare them from some of the suffering that I unfortunately allowed myself to experience in the early years.

So, in that spirit, here are my eight best tips for living with & loving someone with autism. I hope that you will find them helpful...

1. Do not talk about them like they're not in the room, which can inadvertently cause shaming, hurt feelings or embarrassment. It can also undermine their self esteem and create the feeling that there is something fundamentally wrong with them.

2. Recognize that, even though their emotions may not be reaching an outward expression, they absolutely have feelings & are quite sensitive.

3. Help them to identify emotions in others by teaching them what a variety of facial expressions look and feel like.

4. Instead of trying to pull them out of their shell and into the "real world", meet them where they're at and bring an open mind!

5. Encourage them to go with the flow of their passions and to build from there, rather than making what it is they are obsessed with "wrong".

6. Prepare them for transitions by giving them a heads up when the activity or location is about to change, and show them on the calendar what they have to look forward to.

7. Help them to cope with sensory overload by giving them strategies for dealing with bright lights, loud noises, itchy clothing or heavily populated places.

8. Look into the GAPS diet and maybe the Body Ecology diet as well. (Links Below)

KickAss Autism Resources:

"Here's to the kids who are different, 
The kids who don't always get A's 
The kids who have ears twice the size of their peers, 
And noses that go on for days... 
Here's to the kids who are different, 
The kids they call crazy or dumb, 
The kids who don't fit, with the guts and the grit, 
Who dance to a different drum... 
Here's to the kids who are different, 
The kids with the mischievous streak, 
For when they have grown, as history's shown, 
It's their difference that makes them unique." 

(Kids Who Are Different by Digby Wolfe) 

For my fellow Pinterest fans: THiS is a board that I made to pour a little visual energy into My Greatest Goal of creating "A Group Home For Adults Living With Autism In Big Sur With Lots Of Tall Trees, Open Fields, TONS OF LOVE, Experiential Education, A No-Kill Farm, & A Business That The Residents Run Together, Selling Their Wares Online & In Local Shops To Create Their Own Income"...

UPDATE (04-04-14) : Autism Awareness Awesome TAG (video)


  1. I love your enthusiasm and your dedication! You are one of the most beautiful people on the internet, inside and out.


    1. Many people have similarly encouraged me over the years, but I have chosen to spend my time enjoying my son & being thankful for his presence in my life- rather than looking for someone to blame for his having autism. I am an advocate for organic, nature-made food & spread the word about that as much as I am able. My son was certainly instrumental in teaching me about the relationship between food & health. Thanks for your concern :O)

  3. Wow wow wow. Universe totally loves to give us what we need! Vanessa Valencia is one of my most favorite people on the planet, and has been a behind the scenes best faraway friend for a long time (we have matching imaginary glittering capes!) ...anyhoo....I recently remarried after losing a very affectionate, communicative, compassionate outwardly loving (you see where this is going) man to cancer. Before he passed away, while he was still able to talk and express himself, he told me to find someone who would love me, because I was a person who loved to love and be loved.
    Soooo fast forward to 2012, and I meet this guy I adore because of his spirit and zen like wisdom, and his slightly twisted sense of humor (like mine).....
    ...and by August 2013 we are married; however, there are some things slightly off about the relationship. And I can't figure it out. And he blames me, and I blame him, and we're in this cycle. And im thinking is he a narcissist? A Sociopath? Passive Aggressive? But I don't like labels and they really weren't true to his entire being.....
    ...and then I started reading about Asperger's (based on a conversation HE had with a mother of a son with autism)......
    ...and it all clicked. I've read and recognized so many similarities and traits, and what it is like for him to navigate through a neuro-typical world. I've also recognized myself in the wives of many Aspies who didn't know they married someone neurobiologically different and what it's like to try to negotiate understanding around communication and affection.
    And recognizing what an insane world it is for Aspies!
    My husband, though I have talked with his second wife, absolutely does NOT want to be labeled or seek a diagnosis or address the depression or anxiety that often accompanies AS. And so, all I can do is respect his decision and LOVE him......
    ...and here you are, and I appreciate finding you! :)
    Peace and light~

    1. Wow- I feel your LOVE & your love for LOVE coming through all over this. THANK YOU for sharing a bit of your story, Rhonda. I love that you found your way here via Vanessa... she is a beautiful soul & since Like attracts Like, well... you can probably see where I'm going with this. MUCH LOVE to you & your husband. It must be so empowering to at least have a handle on what's going on. It's a great starting point for navigating your relationship- even if he's not willing to take on that label. Awareness sprinkled with kindness goes such a long way... -xo

  4. I have found you.
    Today I watched Silvermoon's video that featured a panel of great inspirational people. I found your contributions to resonate with so much of my journey.
    I was raised in a very religious family and had to shed many of my conditioned limitations. I deal with judgement and resentment. My mother cries for my soul. I don't share my practices or believes as a way to protect and cherish them as my own.
    And now I learn of your experience with a child with autism. I have a 2 and half year old daughter who is scheduled for an autism evaluation. I know the outcome but I need the diagnosis to qualify for resources.
    I will be stalking you for the next couple of days until I catch up. :)
    Thank you for sharing your story and providing me with a little less solitude.

  5. I saw you today for the first time on Silvermoon's show and I thought, Wow this lady talks like me. I was raised in a religious family, I've had to shed my conditioning, my mom cries for my lost soul, and I have trouble working with deities because I don't believe in them. But I do work with Wonder Woman and Captain America. Although I hadn't realized I was from that perspective.

    The final turn in today's path has been to find this post about autism. Another connection. I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter that is scheduled for an autism evaluation. I know the outcome. It's been a huge struggle that many times has made me question mental health. I can't even count how many times I've dreamed of duct taping her to the wall just to stop her from jumping, constant jumping. And her tantrums remind me of banshee folklore. It's common for me to say Release the Kraken when it's clear we won't be having nap time and she gets let out of her crib. Not nice sentiments but it's my truth.
    Your tips here are solid and I will be trying them all.
    Thank you for sharing your story and providing me a less lonely outlook for my challenges.

  6. Greetings Sister! I am about to read this, because I am an unapologetic Jewish Enchantress Witch GOddess who was activated by working with children on the autism spectrum... I am excited to explore your work,
    Light ahead,
    Enchantress Shane